Okay.  Maybe the wine part of grown-up-ism makes it not suck quite so much.  Right now I am sipping a glass of Maryhill Winemaker’s Red.  A delightful little red blend made right here in the great state of Washington.  It’s yummy.  Take my word for it.  You should buy a bottle and taste it.  And, in celebration of Friday we’re having grilled steak for dinner.  And tater tots.  With lots of ketchup.  Maybe we’ll throw a veg in for good measure.

 As a grown-up I find that weekends are both a blessing and a curse.  A blessing because, whoo-hoo! It’s the weekend!  A curse because, a) it’s never long enough and b) there are always so many grown-up responsible things that I need to do that it gets in the way of the fun I want to have.  And I have a keen sense of responsibility.  An ingrained “have to” “need to” “should” that sometimes drives me crazy and sometimes makes me not a very fun girl.  On the other hand, this sense of responsibility also means I’m very organized and very dependable.  There are always two sides to every stone.

This weekend is a perfect example of my ongoing struggle with “need to” and “want to.”  Since starting this blog I’ve realized that there is a particular hobby that I would like to invest more time in and learn more about:  photography.  I currently have a little Canon point-and-shoot.  Nothing real fancy, but it’s a nice little camera and, based upon my research, does really well for a point-and-shoot.  I aspire to upgrade to a DSLR and I’ll get there, but they aren’t cheap and I really don’t know what I want (input would be welcome).

Anyways, my little point-and-shoot has manual settings.  I’ve never used them.  So, I figure, before I make a leap to a DSLR, shouldn’t I oughta learn all of the components of the very camera I own?  I’ve just started down that path and already find myself a bit mystified by terms like ISO, aperture, shutter speed, white balance.  That is what I would like to do this weekend:  do some studying and play with my camera.  And, it turns out there are some tulip fields not too far from me.  I do so love to tip-toe through tulips with a camera in my hand.  I also want to make Jayme’s amazing sounding lemon curd.  You should check her out over at hollyandflora.com.

However, some self-induced “needs” are casting a cloud over my wants.

I started an interior painting project a couple of months ago.  Because this is the time of year one starts interior painting projects, right?  It’s supposed to rain.  Instead, we’ve had beautiful weather that has lured me outside, away from the painting.  So, the project is ongoing.  At a snail’s pace.  Which makes me feel guilty.  Like I should paint each and every weekend.  Even when I don’t want to.  Or when the sun is shining.  Or when we have other plans.  And, the other chores don’t stop needing to be done just because I paint.  There is still laundry and grocery shopping and cleaning and other odds-n-ends.  Here’s where I must also state that the husband is very helpful.  I must confess that I have cleaned the bathrooms in our home approximately 1-2 times since we moved in (5 years ago!)  He is also Chief Bottle Washer (I cook, he does dishes).  He does laundry.  So, I don’t want you to think that I’m on my own when it comes to household chores.

I need to paint tomorrow.  Because Sunday we have brunch plans with friends and I’m making donuts first thing in the morning to take with us.  And I need to go to the grocery store and run other errands afterwards.  Here’s the list of things to do that I’ve put together for the weekend:

 

 And I’m not dragging my heels about all of it.  I’m hanging a beautiful new painting in the living room.  I get to do some cooking, plant some dahlia bulbs that are starting to sprout in the garage, plan the menu for Easter.  Those are all fun.  And the computer battery and resume paper?  I can use my glossy new subscription to Amazon Prime and purchase those from the convenience of my own couch.  Then there’s the responsible grown-up things on the list: go to Costco and order contacts, housework, painting, etc.

Notice how, even though painting is supposed to be a priority, it’s waaaaaay down on the bottom of the list?  And, what’s missing on that list?  Photography.  I think I spend too much time doing what I think I should do and not enough time cultivating the things that I enjoy.  Well.  That’s an enlightening statement.

I’m going to have to think about that.

Over another glass of wine.